What’s the worst piece of advice you have ever received?
Shout out to Angela of Poetisatinta for their interesting response to last week’s prompt.
Write your response in the comments below. Best entry gets a shout out next week!
Write with Heart,
Lady Jabberwocky
Lady Jabberwocky 
Thanks for the shout out – very encouraging!
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I’ll get more into this during seasons 4 and 5 of my blog, but I came of age spiritually as a university student in the late 90s, when the big fad among Christian youth groups and college groups was that dating was inherently unhealthy and un-Biblical. So the worst advice I ever received was most of what that school of thought recommends with regards to relationships. I understand, and agree with, the need to reject the casual hookups and sleeping around that many teens and young adults engage in (even more so today than in the late 90s, it seems). But replacing one-on-one time with potential future spouses with “group dates” doesn’t work at all for a shy-ish introvert like me. I just don’t get to know people if I only hang out with them in groups, because others dominate the conversation and I just feel left out. For me, as a guy who does not know how to talk to or relate to girls, being told not to ever be alone with a girl until I have someone whom I’ve made plans to marry is terrifying and discouraging. All the constant messages of “just keep praying, and the right person will come into your life at the right time” makes me feel somehow unworthy or rejected by God when the right person never does just magically appear in my life out of nowhere. And, of course, when all the people who preached this advice suddenly stopped following it once they met someone just made me angry at their hypocrisy. By the time I was mature enough to realize that this advice was not inspired Scripture that all should aspire to, despite the fact that some churches were teaching it like inspired Scripture, my age-peers were all either married or not interested in someone who had no idea what he was doing. Most of the other people who came of age in this environment and rejected this line of thinking later in life turned away from Christianity and/or the Church entirely.
And considering that the person most often associated with popularizing this movement turned away from Christianity later in life himself, I think it’s pretty clear that this advice is not inspired Scripture.
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(I noticed a few grammatical issues in that long response… sorry about that.)
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I hadn’t thought about it before, but your point about not feeling comfortable talking in groups is an incredible oversight of this Kissing Dating Goodbye balderdash. I’m the same way. I’m not going to talk with the same level of openness when I have an audience of even two people. I’m much more comfortable one-on-one. And how the hell are you supposed to get to know someone well enough to consider marriage without talking about personal things?
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Exactly!
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Hi here is my effort 🙂 https://wordpress.com/post/poetisatinta.wordpress.com/844
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